Real conversations collected somewhere between the levee and the drive-thru `

At a shoe store

Salesperson: “Are you planning on doing more running in them or more cross-training?”

Man: “I plan on doing a lot of walking around Home Depot.”

[Read more "Overheard in Louisiana" jokes here.] 

At a nail salon

Woman #1: “Ugh, I never know what color to get.”

Woman #2: “You say that every time and always get some shade of nipple.”

At a bookstore

Woman #1: “This one’s about a 300-year-old woman cursed to be forgotten by everyone she meets.” 

Woman #2: “Which Real Housewife wrote a memoir?”

Husband: “I really want to get into pickleball.”

Wife: “Man, they really are pickling everything these days.”

At a restaurant

Server: “Ready?”

Diner: “Wait until that table leaves first. I don’t want ‘em to see my swamp ass.”

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Woman with thick Southern drawl: “I need to pay.”

NOLA server: “You already paid, baby.”

Woman: “Noooo, pay. Where’s the restroom?”

At a Bar

Woman #1: “I’m moving to Baton Rouge for my husband.”

Woman #2: “What does he do?”

Woman #1: “I don’t know. I haven’t met him yet.”