Artist Name: NarnianWarrior

my original vote was fairly critical, focusing on most of the instrumentation's quality and the lack of volumization. thank you in advance for resubmitting in the face of negative assessment!

opening musicbox has some harsh and adjacent reverb, coming from a specific note in the box. this smooths out as it starts progressing through Luma. the overall approach is faster, and there's a synth string that comes in to balance a bit. this swells to a bigger synth-driven approach, with some detuned pads and leads driving the melodic material. the nickel creek reference at 1:16 is very clear if you know what to look for.

the track slows down and woobles along to the Sad Girl source. some mids come in at 2:09 that are pretty loud, but the bell progression over them is a fun idea. the arpeggiating elements that come in at 2:34 are very astral and a really neat sound. i still think the chords at 2:51 are a bit too spread out.

there's what kind of feels like a recap for A Wish, with the strings from the original represented with synth strings here, but quickly becomes the reharm of Luma. this does sound similar to before but there's some extra flourishes. this ends with a sustained chord (that seems pretty loud, it's hard to hear what's behind it), and it's done.

this really took a few steps in the right direction. leaning into the synth approach instead of trying for real strings really paid off. and as a whole, there's nowhere near the issues i had with volumization before. i don't think it's perfect, but i do think this is probably over the bar now.

YES

Edited July 29 by prophetik music
fixed a word that i missed first time around

Yep, the source breakdown is super easy to follow and has more than enough to fulfill the quota.  Having remembered the original source material and its usage in game from many a storytime session with Rosalina, using all of these sources with that lore as the glue holding it together is a traditional yet wise call.  The main "Luma" BGM has the opening split between super soft and delicate keys like in the original before having more of a stadium anthem sound at 0:44. "Sad Girl" at 1:43 had a lowered tempo and wobble effects for emotive effect, and 3:08 onward has the feel of 0:08 but with the addition of the string counterpoints of "A Wish" and some melodic variations for the finish.  It seemed like whatever critique you got the first time around has paid off, because going the route of melody tweaking at the end section was a good decision that didn't compromise your original intention.  Sweet stuff.
 

Now, I'm actually more than impressed that you did all this with GarageBand samples, of all things.  Aiming for a more synthetic spread to match your e-piano and bell tones showcases the cohesion of your chosen VSTs, and everything feels clear despite software limitations.  I do, however, feel concerned about the high release in your bell pad during the "Luma" sections, as tonally they're occupying the same register as the lead polysynth and give a false illusion of countermelodies, even though they aren't.  It's particularly noted at 1:02, 1:06, and 1:10, where the chords had grown more sophisticated, as well as the equivalent points in the reprise (3:51, 3:56, 4:00), and I would've preferred the keys to have been a pinch quieter to let the polysynth stick out more.  I did originally think, "could it sound less clashing transposed down an octave," but it would also compromise the playful music box sound - though that said, octave experimentation is a valid avenue for balancing future projects.
 

All in all, very cute work, and it's done enough to get past the bar for me.

YES

I recall this one, glad to see it back in a new form with revisions.

Glad you leaned into the strength of this piece, and that's the strongly emotive nature of the track. This has a greater depth of dynamics now. The parts feel relatively balanced. The drums could be more present but as they are now is fine.

The transition at 1:42 is almost too long of a pause, especially landing on the tonic because it feels so settled. Almost as if it was signaling the end of the piece. The same thing for the transition back to the head (2:51-3:07). The length of the pauses also gives weight to the emotion as well, so that is a nice addition as well. There's just a fine line as to how much is too much. Nice work.

The whole track is also a smidge quiet as well, and might benefit from gentle compression to bring everything up without losing the dynamics. Not necessary, but something to think about for the future.

The 3:11 added countermelodies here are very nice and were a good way to add more uplift to signal the final recap. I get a hint of slightly louder and fuller sound for the recap as well. Would have liked just a little bit more to differentiate it from the beginning, but what's here is good enough.

It's not perfect, but again; good job sticking with this and bringing it up.

YES